Pregnant No More

I called early yesterday morning for an appointment to see Dr. Lim. And went down to his clinic with my mum. The name of the clinic is Tow Yung Clinic located at Tanglin Shopping Center, according to my church sister, Qingli, the clinic is popular among the rich Indonesian Tai Tais. I got my weight and urine test done, and we waited for our turn.

At 12:10pm my name was called, we waited more than 1hr30mins for my turn. Dr. Lim is a 60's something old uncle and he look very fatherly. Feels very comfortable talking to him. He did a scan and told me that my pregnancy is not normal and in medical term is called 'Blighted Ovum' (An empty sac on the scan is a sign of a blighted ovum, where conception occurred and the fertilised egg implanted in your womb but the baby did not develop) Haiz... is confirmed after the second opinion, no choice but to accept it. I have a D&C done, the whole process took about 1 hour. Can't believed that I have had two D&C done within 4 months.

I feel sad and disappointed but at least I am ever being pregnant, and I experience what is called morning sickness and I was being treated like a empress in the house :)

A Second Opinion

A church sister, Qingli called around 9pm asking about me as I haven't been going to Sunday service for more than a month now. I told her that I'm expecting, she too was shocked. I told her my worries and thinking of having a second opinion because my baby had no heartbeat yet. She recommended and encouraged me to visit her ex-gynae Dr. Lim, a very experience old male gynae. She said in order not to have any regrets in my life, should go and try whatever we can. So i went.

I'm 8 Weeks Pregnant

Dropping by to Dr. Ang's clinic for another scan today, I'm feeling better this morning. I was hoping for a miracle today, and I wanted to see the baby heartbeat but the result is the same. No heartbeat... Dr. Ang suggested for a second opinion, to get another scan done at the another clinic. What other options does we have? Okay, let's schedule another scan next Tuesday at Thomson Medical then.

I'm looking very pale now, no appetite and I ate very little. When I eat, is just for my baby.

GoodBye Hamster Girl Girl

2 hamsters passed away in just 2 days :(

Yesterday was Mama hamster and today was hamster girl girl. Hamster girl girl had lots of growth around her mouth and ear area.

May you Rest in Peace.

11 May 2009 - 13 May 2010

Goodbye Mama Hamster

Mama hamster(aka Minnie) passed away this morning. Sad that she left but at least she's not in pain & suffering anymore. She was there lying motionless for the lasted 2 days ago, not consuming any food (including her favorite meal worms) & drink.

We were still able to see her heart pumping around 12 in the midnight, and this morning her body stiffen, she passed away peacefully. My hubby wrapped her up and put her inside the tiny red box that i have prepared for her after seeing her draining away bit by bit, day by day.

Thanks mama hamster for bringing me joy & happiness. You will be missed.

24hrs Emergency

As the spotting didn't stop, we decided to see Dr. Ang at the 24hrs emergency. Another scanned was done, the sac is still there but empty, why??? Dr. Ang wants me to see him the following week but I decided to push for another week waiting for a miracle to happen.

I did alot of thinking, especially when I'm bedridden. I told god that if you ready want to give me this baby, please give the baby heartbeat, if not I can accept it. I pray to god everyday, I want a miracle for my baby. I cried alot during this few weeks and I'm getting very emotional.

I Bled...

I started to get spotting this afternoon, it started around 2:20pm this afternoon. Being a first time mother-to-be, I'm scared, I'm alone, I don't know what to do. I quickly called my hubby, he rushed back home and he called Dr Ang immediately. He checked with Dr. Ang, "Is normal to get spotting during the first trimester?" Doc replied it's normal as my body is adjusting to the hormone.

What can I do now? Basically nothing! Just got to take plenty of rest, rest & more rest.

Seeing The Gynae

Ah Fang recommended to me a gynae from Thomson Medical Center, got an appointment fixed today at 8:45am. My hubby and me reached the clinic before 8:30am but we are not the first one to reach. I think he must be very good as lots of mum-to-be sees him.

As it was my first time seeing Dr Ang, he asked, "Is this is your 4th or 5th pregnancy?", do I really looked like someone who is so fertile? He was quite surprised when I told him that this is my first pregnancy. I had 2 scans and turn out the sac is empty. Dr Ang explained that there is only 2 possibilities; one is early pregnancy that still cannot be detected, and the other possibility is an unhealthy pregnancy. Of course, to be optimistic I accepted the first reason.

It is our 10 years wedding anniversary today but there is no celebration because I couldn't walk much without feeling tired easily.

I'm 6 Weeks Pregnant

More vomiting today... all happened only at night. Should called it 'night sickness' instead of 'morning sickness' :)

My Morning Sickness

I vomited first time due to my pregnancy, vomited so hard that I can't even controlled my urine. Pregnant women can experience morning sickness anytime of the day. I'm becoming more sensitive to smell, I don't like the smell of garlic, air freshener, shampoo, shower gel... I no longer likes those things that I used to. And dislike food which is white in color, I used to like eating rice & beancurd and now I don't. I eat very little and I am beginning to lose appetite upon seeing food. My favorite drink now is ribena, I don't like plain water anymore.

It Breaks My Heart Seeing This

Minnie (aka mama hammie) is seriously sick, she had a large tumor nearly the same size as her growing on her right side. Her ability to maneuver is restricted by her growth, she had to drag herself around. Seeing it makes my heart heavy and how i wish i could do something to ease her pain. The tumor is pretty scary, it seems to be draining/feeding her as she seems to be shrinking day by day. Even though she looks weary..she still enjoys every meal time, and whenever i feed her favourite meal worms, she eat it as normal; and seeing it, i cry.